Have you ever been perplexed as to why a student’s behavior suddenly changed? Perhaps there has been a pattern of persistently challenging or disruptive behavior in the classroom that has prevented the entire class from learning? As educators, we can occasionally forget that the key to behavior is communication. You’ve taken the first step toward making a difference if you stopped to ask a student, “How are you?” The goal of empathy interviews is to help people probe much deeper than the surface level of “how are you?” and the typical “I’m fine” response. It assists us in determining the current condition of students as well as their needs and the best ways to meet those needs.
In her essay “Why Should I Care?,” Lisa Owen emphasizes the importance of applying empathy outside of the classroom by defining it as the ability to comprehend another person’s feelings without having first-hand experience. As a result, students are better able to establish long-lasting, positive relationships with both their classmates and members of their community.
I’m constantly learning that there is so much more going on in my students’ lives than what we think we already know. What did you learn? How did this affect student learning? How has this changed or shaped your teaching practice? Generally speaking, I am aware of what is going on in my students’ lives, but there are times when I am not. I was able to identify many problems that my students were dealing with and give them and their families the resources and support they needed. Given a lot of this information, I was able to work with their teachers in the classroom to alert them or perhaps work with them to find ways to meet their needs. In addition to myself and the students, I’ve learned and seen how conducting empathy interviews and teaching empathy actually creates a more positive environment for my students to interact with one another in my classroom (pull-out setting) and on the playground. These abilities are beginning to transfer to how they interact with their families and even with peers in other classes at school. Students occasionally just require someone to listen to them and talk to.
What feelings and methods are displayed? – Why is the person acting in that way?
Set a time and date for when you will withdraw your student. You should naturally begin the conversation in a non-aggressive manner, and if a student would benefit from knowing beforehand, go ahead and let them know. Offer to hold the interview outside or in any other preferred location that is convenient at the time (this helps to make it less serious). If you need to postpone the interview because of the student’s mood or state of mind, do so; however, don’t wait too long after the incident (if that incident is the reason why the empathy interview is being conducted). Putting down the pen/pencil and paper to engage in casual conversation is beneficial. Students may become very anxious if they believe you are recording every word they say. My students are accustomed to my laptop being next to me in my office, where the empathy interview will take place, so it will be natural to have the plan for your interview opened to your side view. To follow up and, if necessary, provide resources or collaborate with other staff, immediately write or type your notes. Avoid conducting an interview as if it was an interrogation. What other questions might you put to a student who doesn’t seem willing to answer in order to elicit the desired response Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable in order for more stories to come from the student, but keep in mind that the main focus is the student. What else can you do or say to make the student feel more comfortable? Be open and honest to the point where the student begins to trust you because you were willing to share something with them and they recognize your efforts to connect. The interview may last longer than expected, so be prepared to cry and refrain from speaking for them.
Give the student a heads-up about whatever is next on your agenda as well as what you had anticipated.
Don’t provide answers to your questions: Even if they pause before responding, don’t assist them by providing a solution. This may unintentionally persuade individuals to express opinions in line with your expectations. Ask questions neutrally. Don’t be afraid of silence. Frequently, if silence is allowed, someone will reflect on what they just said and say something more profound. Look for contradictions: Sometimes, people’s actions or later statements contradict what they said at the time. Gracefully probe these contradictions. Be aware of nonverbal cues: Consider body language and emotions. Maintain the same line of inquiry: React to the interviewee’s responses and ask additional questions to elicit more information. Simple questions like “Oh, why do you say that?” and “What were you feeling at that point?” should be used to elicit more information from him.
Student 1’s empathy interview (5th grade) revealed that the student hasn’t been turning in any of his or her assignments. The teacher in the student’s class frequently reminds the student to focus or to stop talking. The student’s teacher noted that he or she frequently talks back and appeared to be dozing off in class.
Q: Hey (insert name)! How is everything going in Ms. B’s room? A: It’s . good. I noticed you took a brief break between your responses. What’s going on? A: Nothing. Q: It seems like something else is on your mind. Correct me if I’m wrong! A: It’s just. I always get in trouble, why do you think that is? A: I think it’s because she hates me. Q: What! I don’t think she hates you. Can you give me an instance when you got into trouble and felt that way? A: I was seeking assistance from (insert name of table companion here) because I wasn’t sure what to do. She yelled at me because she assumed I was talking about something else. Q: Ahh, I see what you’re saying. When you asked your tablemate a question, what was going on in the classroom? A: She was reviewing our math lesson. When she was teaching, did you happen to speak? A: Yes, but it was about what we were doing. She didn’t have to yell at me. But whatever. I’m used to it. Why do you say you’re used to it? A: I always get yelled at.
Q: By Ms. B? Other people? A: By Ms. B… and at home Q: Can we look at Ms. B’s perspective on what you just said, please? *We then discussed when it is appropriate to speak in class and how asking for assistance during the wrong parts of a lesson might come across in a different way. We continued our interview after the student had a chance to understand* Q: What’s going on at home? A: My baby sister (insert her name here) is always crying at night. I need to sleep but I don’t. I therefore consistently nod off in class and get into trouble. Q: Does Ms. B know about this? A: No. I tried to tell her but she doesn’t care. Do you believe it would be beneficial for me to speak with her about a few things you are feeling, or perhaps we can speak as a group? But yeah, my little sister keeps crying, and then… *long pause* *student proceeds to cry*.
To cut a long story short, I learned that the student was dealing with a lot of personal issues at home, in addition to his infant sister constantly crying at night. While his mother is currently unemployed, his stepdad has been supporting the family. Although not the best example in his life, his biological father continues to play a negative role in it. I’m afraid she won’t return, he said to me as his mother was leaving the country to see his step-father’s family. What if something happens to the plane. What if she likes that family better than ours. I don’t think she’s going to be back. I’m stupid. My teacher thinks I’m stupid. They think I’m stupid. She won’t return because of my penchant for getting into mischief. The student’s teacher had just finished a lesson on airplanes in which she addressed airplane crashes. Since then, the student has been concerned for both his mother’s life and his own future. He pointed out that many of the modifications and accommodations that he is entitled to weren’t always available in the context of general education. I was able to contact the parent as a result of this (without the student knowing). My student felt much better after this conversation and was at ease with me calling his mother. His mother learned more details about him, their family, and other issues she’s been worried about, including his self-esteem. This made it possible for me to establish positive relationships with both my student and his family. Additionally, I was able to assist in supplying resources for getting outside counseling (for both individuals and families). After just one empathy interview, I have already seen a significant change in this student’s behavior as he is now turning in his homework and requesting frequent “check-ins” with me. He has significantly increased his optimism at school and feels at ease approaching me whenever something doesn’t feel right. He is more eager to participate in class and even completed a solar system class project on which he had originally predicted receiving an incomplete!
Fifth-grade Student 2 Empathy Interview: Observation: P was treated disrespectfully E. arguing with staff, being disrespectful, throwing objects over the fence, not participating in activities, etc.
This empathy interview took a little longer to conduct because this student had a tough exterior to break. I wish I had recorded it. I had to break apart this interview into three sessions. In our initial meeting, I explained the situation to him and explained why I wanted to check in with him. The empathy interview was more of a focus in session 2, and session 3 was a follow-up with a staff member. Overall, this student expressed how much he detested P. E. and the instructor. Later, I found that this student needed more structure and clarification during P E. For instance, the student became enraged after noticing an error in the scoring system and eventually stopped participating in the activity in favor of yelling about how “stupid” he thought everything was (his team was also losing). By asking for a physical scorekeeper and assigning someone to be the scorekeeper during games, we were able to resolve this. He also expressed his displeasure that, despite being told that soccer is on the agenda for the day, all they would do was engage in activities involving a soccer ball. He concurred that calling the activity by a different name and being aware of what it was beforehand would both be beneficial. The P. E. instructor was more than willing to incorporate these ideas. Additionally, this student is getting support for dealing with aggression. Together, we were able to develop a strategy to place a visible “break time” sign between the student and P. E. instructor, from whom he could obtain some water, take a break, etc. His participation and behavior in P. E. He was occasionally in need of specific reminders to be flexible, but definitely a celebration as his grade went from a D to a B!
Student 3 Empathy Interview (4th grade) (Highlights): The student was yelling and banging his hands on the lunch table. During lunchtime recess, he was kicking his classmates and battling over a soccer ball. Rather than stretching as instructed, he was addressing his peers. Student kept making noises after classmates did it in class. He was holding his peers’ feet on the swing at the end of the day.
This student often demonstrates inconsistencies in his behavior. I conducted an empathy interview with this student and discovered that this was the third time this year that his father had abandoned his family. He cares deeply about his father and frequently overlooks the fact that his mother has been his main source of support throughout his life. I noticed that his behaviors mostly happen when his father is gone because he only shows up for brief periods of time before disappearing (asking how his weekend was always helps me predict how the week will likely go). He was willing to be open with me during our interview. He said the resistance band in his classroom really helps him because there are times when he feels like he can’t resist the urge to touch a different student. He agreed when I asked if he would benefit from pulling out a small fidget to keep in his pocket whenever he felt the urge to be hands-on. This ultimately led me to buy materials to make sensory boxes for all of the primary classrooms I work with (along with a few other students I work with). Students can take any necessary sensory breaks in my office, and I’ve also provided an exercise corner template (the finished product has velcro). The day before I interviewed this student, his daily chart showed a 58%. He received a 98% on his daily chart the day after we added the fidget in the pocket.
I was able to establish an even stronger rapport with my students, their families, and their classroom teachers thanks to my empathy interviews. By conducting these empathy interviews, I was able to learn that more of my students need these resources – some of whom aren’t even on my caseload – and I was also able to establish a good working relationship with South Bay Community Services, who I now turn to when I need to refer my students and their families for outside assistance.
Empathy Interview Example
The TLA Real-Time Redesign release, a useful toolkit for enhancing equity and resiliency in schools, includes this tactic. Discover more tips, information, and resources by reading the entire guide.
This activity was inspired by the “Build a Question Guide” stage of the IDEO Design Thinking for Educators Toolkit.
Speaking with students, families, teachers, and classified staff who aren’t typically asked for their opinions is important if you want your design process to address the most pressing issues preventing equity and resiliency, especially those who don’t feel supported or seen in the current system. Your design team should ideally already include these people, as empathy interviews will add valuable information to the discussion.
Empathy interviews can be challenging for some. Interviewing someone you have never met can be uncomfortable because the process is slower and more limited than surveying or holding listening circles. However, when combined with other methods, they are an effective tool for discovering the causes of nagging issues.
Before conducting empathy interviews, it is crucial to think about your personal identity and any potential power dynamics that may be present.
To cut a long story short, I learned that the student was dealing with a lot of personal issues at home, in addition to his infant sister constantly crying at night. While his mother is currently unemployed, his stepdad has been supporting the family. Although not the best example in his life, his biological father continues to play a negative role in it. I’m afraid she won’t return, he said to me as his mother was leaving the country to see his step-father’s family. What if something happens to the plane. What if she likes that family better than ours. I don’t think she’s going to be back. I’m stupid. My teacher thinks I’m stupid. They think I’m stupid. She won’t return because of my penchant for getting into mischief. The student’s teacher had just finished a lesson on airplanes in which she addressed airplane crashes. Since then, the student has been concerned for both his mother’s life and his own future. He pointed out that many of the modifications and accommodations that he is entitled to weren’t always available in the context of general education. I was able to contact the parent as a result of this (without the student knowing). My student felt much better after this conversation and was at ease with me calling his mother. His mother learned more details about him, their family, and other issues she’s been worried about, including his self-esteem. This made it possible for me to establish positive relationships with both my student and his family. Additionally, I was able to assist in supplying resources for getting outside counseling (for both individuals and families). After just one empathy interview, I have already seen a significant change in this student’s behavior as he is now turning in his homework and requesting frequent “check-ins” with me. He has significantly increased his optimism at school and feels at ease approaching me whenever something doesn’t feel right. He is more eager to participate in class and even completed a solar system class project on which he had originally predicted receiving an incomplete!
What feelings and methods are displayed? – Why is the person acting in that way?
Student 1’s empathy interview (5th grade) revealed that the student hasn’t been turning in any of his or her assignments. The teacher in the student’s class frequently reminds the student to focus or to stop talking. The student’s teacher noted that he or she frequently talks back and appeared to be dozing off in class.
I was able to establish an even stronger rapport with my students, their families, and their classroom teachers thanks to my empathy interviews. By conducting these empathy interviews, I was able to learn that more of my students need these resources – some of whom aren’t even on my caseload – and I was also able to establish a good working relationship with South Bay Community Services, who I now turn to when I need to refer my students and their families for outside assistance.
Q: By Ms. B? Other people? A: By Ms. B… and at home Q: Can we look at Ms. B’s perspective on what you just said, please? *We then discussed when it is appropriate to speak in class and how asking for assistance during the wrong parts of a lesson might come across in a different way. We continued our interview after the student had a chance to understand* Q: What’s going on at home? A: My baby sister (insert her name here) is always crying at night. I need to sleep but I don’t. I therefore consistently nod off in class and get into trouble. Q: Does Ms. B know about this? A: No. I tried to tell her but she doesn’t care. Do you believe it would be beneficial for me to speak with her about a few things you are feeling, or perhaps we can speak as a group? But yeah, my little sister keeps crying, and then… *long pause* *student proceeds to cry*.
FAQ
What are good empathy interview questions?
- What does empathy mean to you?
- When is it most important to use empathy?
- Who inspires you most?
- What aspect of empathetic behavior in the workplace is most crucial?
- How would you describe the relationship between empathy and leadership?
What are empathy interviews for students?
Open-ended questions are typically used in one-on-one conversations during empathy interviews to elicit stories about particular experiences that reveal unmet needs. Compared to a more conventional interview, a protocol enables the interviewer to delve deeper into stories.
How do you demonstrate empathy in an interview?
As they speak, nod your head to demonstrate that you’re paying attention. Also, keep your eyes open and your body language open. Even if you’re conducting an online interview, these points are still applicable.
How do you use empathy as a strength interview question?
- Build Authentic Connection. …
- Demonstrate an Ability to Listen. …
- Show Respect for Others. …
- Indicate a Team-Player Attitude.
