How to Have That Difficult Conversation With Your Boss About Mental Health

Mental health issues affect more people than you might think. According to the CDC, 1 in 5 American adults experience some form of mental illness each year. Despite how common mental health struggles are, they are still stigmatized, especially in the workplace. Because of the stigma, many employees are reluctant to talk to their managers about any mental health challenges they face However, having an open and honest conversation with your boss about mental health can greatly benefit both you and your company This article will provide tips on how to have that difficult but important talk.

Why You Should Talk to Your Boss

Here are some of the key reasons why speaking to your manager about mental health is worth it

• It allows you to get the support you need. Your boss can’t help accommodate your needs if they don’t know what’s going on. Whether it’s adjusting your workload or hours, getting connected to an employee assistance program, or something else, you have to speak up first.

• It helps reduce stigma. The more people that talk openly about mental health at work, the more these conversations become normalized and less taboo. You speaking up makes it easier for others.

• It shows you’re responsible and proactive. Taking initiative to have the conversation demonstrates professionalism and that you want to do your job well, despite any challenges.

• It can improve your performance. Getting mental health struggles addressed often leads to increased focus, productivity, and motivation at work. It’s a “win-win.”

• Your boss may share similar experiences. You might be surprised how much they can relate if you open up. Sharing builds trust and rapport.

How to Prepare For the Conversation

Before talking to your manager, make sure you take some time to prepare:

• Reflect on what you want to share. You don’t have to disclose your full medical history. Focus on how your mental health specifically affects your work.

• List any accommodations or solutions you need. Come armed with realistic requests that can help you manage the situation.

• Know your legal rights. Be aware of laws like FMLA, ADA, and HIPAA so you can advocate for yourself.

• Rehearse what you want to say. Practicing helps you feel less anxious and ensures your message comes across clearly.

• Pick a private setting. Don’t just stop by your boss’s desk—schedule a meeting room so you can chat confidentially.

How to Frame the Conversation

When it comes time for the big talk, keep these framing tips in mind:

• Emphasize you want to do your job well. Make clear you’re bringing this up because you care about your performance and the company’s success.

• Stick to objective facts. Focus on concrete issues like deadlines you’ve missed or meetings you’ve been unable to attend.

• Listen as much as you talk. Give your boss a chance to ask clarifying questions, express any concerns, and provide input.

• Find common ground. Highlight how supporting you aligns with the company’s values, policies, or diversity and inclusion efforts.

• Be solution-focused. Shift the discussion to reasonable accommodations or next steps instead of dwelling on struggles.

What to Discuss

To structure the dialogue, try covering these topics:

• Briefly summarize your specific mental health condition or challenge.
• Explain how it impacts your work—energy levels, concentration, interacting with others, etc.
• Share your treatment plan—therapy, medication, lifestyle changes, etc.
• Discuss accommodations that would help you manage your symptoms.
• Explore adjustments to your workload, hours, or environment.
• Get connected to employee assistance programs and mental health resources.
• Invite your boss to ask any questions about your condition or support needs.
• Agree to keep communicating and provide updates on how things are going.

Don’t…

While transparency about mental health is important, oversharing or providing too many details can make the conversation less productive. Avoid:

• Getting too emotional or defensive
• Complaining about colleagues or company culture
• Making demands vs. requests
• Rambling off track or overexplaining
• Getting overly clinical if your boss seems overwhelmed

Do…

Stick to these best practices when opening up:

• Express appreciation for their time and concern
• Establish it’s an ongoing dialogue, not a one-time thing
• Present realistic solutions vs. just voicing grievances
• Remain calm and professional throughout
• Clarify you want to be a valued, contributing team member

Conversation Follow-Up

To ensure your talk leads to real change:

• Email a summary of key points and next steps agreed upon
• Check in periodically on how the accommodations are working
• Provide status updates on your condition and performance
• Continue being proactive about managing your health
• Monitor progress and make any needed adjustments

Speaking openly about mental health demonstrates courage, vulnerability, and dedication. While it may seem daunting at first, having the conversation creates an opportunity to get support, reduce stigma, and thrive in your role. Give yourself credit for prioritizing well-being and showing that mental health matters. Both you and your employer will be better for it.

The key is approaching the dialogue thoughtfully and professionally. Follow these tips to make discussing your mental health needs with your boss as positive and productive as possible. With effort and understanding from both sides, you can find solutions that work for everyone.