How to Deal With a Poor Communicator: 15 Tips for Improving Communication

Not everyone is great at communicating. Whether it be a client, a colleague, or even your boss, youâre going to work with people who just canât seem to get their point across, let alone listen to yours. Bad communicators arenât bad people–theyâre just missing some key communication skills, like active listening and concise language.

Dealing with a poor communicator can be frustrating. Conversations quickly become one-sided, messages get lost in translation, and you’re often left confused about expectations. Instead of getting annoyed or giving up, there are several strategies you can use to improve communication.

With some patience and effort you can facilitate clearer, more effective conversations. Here are 15 tips for handling poor communicators.

Recognize the Signs of a Poor Communicator

The first step is identifying when someone struggles to convey their message. Here are some common traits of poor communicators:

They ramble or speak vaguely without making their point clear. You’re often left wondering, “What are they trying to say?”
They dominate conversations by talking at length without allowing others to speak
They avoid direct language and beat around the bush.
They mumble, speak unclearly, or use terminology others don’t understand.
They frequently misunderstand what others are saying and misinterpret information.
They lack eye contact, attentive listening, and don’t ask clarifying questions.
They display closed-off or distracted body language during conversations.
They regularly miss deadlines, forget agreements, or fail to respond to inquiries.
Written communication contains many spelling/grammar mistakes, lacks organization, or is overly formal/lengthy.
They become defensive or blame others when communication breakdowns occur.

Change Your Perspective

Instead of labeling someone as a “bad” communicator, look at them with empathy. There may be underlying reasons for their struggles:

They have a different communication style than you. For instance, you may be very direct while they tend to be indirect.
They lack confidence or self-awareness around their communication abilities.
They have blind spots in their listening abilities, public speaking skills, or emotional intelligence.
They are stressed, distracted, or disorganized, which interferes with communication.
They have different cultural norms or speak English as a second language.

Reframing the person as “inexperienced” rather than incompetent can help you respond with patience and compassion.

Be a Clear Communicator Yourself

Model the communication style you’d like to see from them. Speaking clearly, listening attentively, and using positive body language encourages reciprocation.

Some best practices include:

Making eye contact and facing the person to show you’re engaged.
Speaking slowly, avoiding mumbling or use of slang.
Summarizing key points to ensure understanding.
Asking the other person open-ended questions to facilitate a two-way dialogue.
Providing feedback without judgement so they know how to improve.
Using “I” statements to express your needs and avoid misunderstandings.
Following up in writing if verbal conversations remain unclear.

Put Matters in Writing

For some poor communicators, the written word is more effective. After an in-person or phone conversation, send a recap email highlighting:

Key discussion points and decisions
Action items and owners
Deadlines and next steps
Anything that remains ambiguous

Ask them to reply confirming everything is accurate. This provides clarification and documentation.

For complex matters, prepare an agenda in advance so everyone’s on the same page. Taking detailed meeting notes can also help minimize confusion.

Talk In Person

Chatting in real time helps avoid delayed responses, missing context, and crossed wires.

Schedule a face-to-face meeting in a quiet setting without distractions. Make it a two-way dialogue rather than a lecture.

Speaking in person allows you to use vocal inflection, body language, and visual aids to better convey your message. It also gives the other person a chance to ask clarifying questions.

Ask Clarifying Questions

Don’t make assumptions about unclear messages. Politely seek clarification by asking:

“Could you please rephrase that for me?”
“I want to make sure I understand correctly. Are you saying…?”
“Could you provide some examples of what you mean by that?”
“Could you elaborate a bit on that point?”
“I’m afraid I’m a bit lost. Can you spell out your thought process?”

Repeating their main points back to them in your own words also helps ensure you understand what they intend to communicate.

Act as a Facilitator

At times you may need to act as a communication facilitator, guiding the discussion to keep things on track.

If they ramble excessively, politely interject to refocus the key points. If they miss speaking cues, guide the conversation to give others a chance to talk.

You can also facilitate email exchanges by highlighting sections needing clarification and posing direct questions.

Acting as a facilitator helps compensate for their communication limitations without being condescending.

Use Body Language Strategically

Since poor communicators miss nonverbal cues, be deliberate with your body language when interacting face-to-face:

Maintain open posture and lean in slightly to show engagement.
Nod to affirm you’re listening and comprehending.
Make thoughtful eye contact without staring intensely.
Raise your eyebrows or tilt your head to convey confusion.
Take notes to retain critical details.
Avoid distracted gestures like fidgeting that suggest lack of focus.

Find the Right Time and Place

Conversations are more successful when the timing and setting allows the other person to be present.

Before initiating an important dialogue:

Avoid times when they seem preoccupied or stressed.
Suggest talking at a time of day when they tend to be most focused.
Pick a private spot without disruptions or background noise.
Close laptops/turn off phones to minimize distractions.

Break Down Complex Concepts

When explaining complicated subject matter:

Outline the key themes and ideas before delving into specifics.
Break down large concepts into smaller, more digestible chunks.
Use simple analogies and metaphors to illustrate points.
Supplement verbal explanations with visuals like charts, diagrams or slide presentations.
Pause frequently to check their comprehension.

Be Supportive Through Communication Breakdowns

No one communicates flawlessly 100% of the time. When conversations go off track:

Point out the miscommunication calmly without judgment.
Work together to pinpoint where wires got crossed.
Brainstorm ways to prevent future misunderstandings.
If emotions run high, take a break and resume when you’ve both had a chance to cool down.
Focus the discussion on resolving the situation rather than blaming.

Adjust Your Expectations

Accept that you’ll need additional time and effort to achieve mutual understanding. Don’t rely on quick phone calls or short emails for complex interactions.

Factor in extra time for:

Explaining context and background, even if you’ve covered it before
Fielding their questions and providing clarification
Following up to confirm shared meaning
Revisiting agreements to refresh their memory

Remain realistic about the pace of progress when working through issues.

Practice Active Listening

One of the best ways to connect is fully concentrating on what the other person expresses without thinking about your response.

Active listening techniques include:

Avoiding interruptions and distractions
Using affirmative words like “Okay,” “I see,” or “Tell me more”
Asking open-ended questions to uncover deeper meaning
Paraphrasing their main points to confirm your interpretation
Giving them your full visual attention

Through close listening instead of quick reaction, you gain greater insight into their perspective.

Leverage Their Strengths

While focusing on improving weaker skills, also identify and utilize communication methods that work well for the individual.

If they express themselves better in writing, opt for email. If they prefer live presentations, schedule more meetings. Adapt your styles to allow more two-way dialogue in their best communication mediums.

When you know their capabilities, delegate responsibilities suited to their strengths. This minimizes frustration and builds confidence.

Remain Patient and Positive

Lastly, retain an encouraging attitude. Communicating effectively with poor communicators takes concerted attention, thoughtfulness, and effort from both parties. While progress can be slow, avoid expressing irritation or criticism. With consistent positive reinforcement, their skills can gradually improve over time.

how to deal with poor communicator

Listen First, React Second

So much of good communication is actually about listening and understanding what the other person has to say, rather than making yourself understood. When you know what your colleague or client is attempting to tell you, youâll be better equipped to respond in a way that they will understand and respect. When active listening, itâs important to show the speaker that you are engaged through your body language and by reflecting their wording in your own. For more tips on active listening, check out this blog post.

Be Respectful, Kind, and Well-Mannered

When dealing with a defensive or frustrated person, itâs important that your words and body language represent an open and honest pathway for communication. This will help relax the person you are trying to communicate with and put them off the defensive.

Know as much as you can about the situation or conflict before you talk to the source. Clear up any confusions early on in the conversation so that youâre on the same page.

Poor Communicator or The Silent Treatment? How to Deal With It

What is a poor communicator?

People with poor communication skills may struggle for many reasons, including fear of conflict, impatience, or being raised by people with weak communication habits. Whatever the sources of the malfunctions, certain behaviors indicate weak communication.

How do you deal with a poor communicator?

Being an effective communicator yourself is a powerful way to balance working with a poor communicator, especially when you’re aware of the challenges. Consider developing and honing your speaking, listening, writing and nonverbal skills. Here are some ways to communicate clearly: Take action on misinterpreted or ignored directions or guidance.

How do you know if your communication is bad?

Poor communication can leave you feeling frustrated, upset, distant, confused, and more. Even if you can’t pinpoint exactly where the communication is breaking down, you can feel the stress of those interactions. This is why it’s important to identify the signs of poor communication in your relationships, so you can work to address them.

Are bad communication skills sabotaging your life?

If bad communication skills are sabotaging your life, then identifying your mistakes will help you adopt better communication strategies. What is a Poor Communicator? People with poor communication skills may struggle for many reasons, including fear of conflict, impatience, or being raised by people with weak communication habits.