The Complete Guide to the Dos and Don’ts of Writing a Reference Letter

A reference letter can make or break someone’s job application As the letter writer, you have a lot of power to influence the hiring manager’s decision That’s why it’s so important to know the dos and don’ts of writing an effective reference letter.

In this complete guide, we will walk through the best practices for crafting a compelling and truthful reference letter Follow these tips, and you’ll write a letter that makes a strong case for the job candidate

Choose Your Letter Writers Carefully

Not everyone makes a good reference letter writer. As the job seeker, carefully consider who you want to ask for a recommendation. Choose people who:

  • Know you well and can speak in detail about your qualifications
  • Have seen your work firsthand, ideally in a supervisor capacity
  • Can highlight your most relevant and impressive accomplishments
  • Will paint you in a positive light and advocate for your candidacy

Steer clear of asking family, friends peers or acquaintances who don’t know you in a professional context. Their letters won’t carry much weight compared to supervisors and mentors.

When in doubt if someone will write you a strong letter, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask politely, “Do you feel you know my work well enough to write a positive recommendation letter?” This gives them an easy out if they don’t feel comfortable endorsing you.

Contact Potential Writers Before Listing Them as a Reference

It’s common courtesy to get someone’s permission before listing them as a reference. Don’t assume that just because someone was your boss, they’ll be willing to take the time to vouch for you.

Reach out to potential letter writers early in your job search process with a request like:

“I’m in the process of applying for a [position] role at [company]. You’ve seen my work firsthand in [context]. Would you feel comfortable writing a recommendation letter highlighting my qualifications if I move forward in the hiring process?”

This gives them advanced notice that they may be asked to write a letter down the line. It’s also a respectful way to give them an easy out if they don’t have the time or don’t feel equipped to write a letter.

If they agree, send follow up details about the position you’re applying for and make sure to say thank you for their willingness to help.

Ask for Letters Early in the Hiring Process

As soon as you know you want to apply somewhere, start securing reference letters. Don’t wait until you’re deep into the interview process to bother your references.

Rushing letter writers leads to generic, vague recommendations. When you give them plenty of advance notice, they can thoughtfully craft a detailed letter tailored to the role.

Ideally, have recommendation letters ready to submit by the time you apply. If the employer wants letters later, you’ll have them on hand.

Don’t Be Offended if Someone Declines

There are many valid reasons someone may not be able to write you a letter, such as lacking the time or not feeling they know your work well enough. Try not to take it personally if someone says no.

Politely ask if there is anyone else they would recommend speaking to instead. At the very least, they may be willing to serve as a verbal reference even if they can’t write a letter.

If you have any hesitations that the letter may not be positive, it’s better not to use that person anyways. Having no letter is better than a weak letter.

Provide Letter Writers With Relevant Information

Make your letter writer’s job easier by providing:

  • A copy of your resume and cover letter
  • The job description and requirements
  • Key skills and qualifications to emphasize
  • Your relationship details (their job title, how long you worked together, etc.)
  • Any helpful anecdotes about projects or accomplishments to mention

Giving clear guidance about what to include helps them write a detailed, compelling letter instead of something vague.

Avoid Surprising Letter Writers With Last Minute Requests

Springing a reference letter request on someone not only feels disrespectful, but it also results in weaker letters.

If they haven’t heard about the job until you ask for a letter, they won’t be able to speak to your qualifications in an in-depth way. Give them a heads up when you start job hunting so they have time to gather their thoughts.

Check in with potential writers regularly:

  • When you start applying
  • After your interview to give updates
  • Well before the letter due date

This keeps them looped in so they can write the best letter possible.

Send Friendly Reminders About Deadlines

Don’t assume a letter writer will remember the due date you mentioned weeks earlier. Send a friendly reminder about a week before you need the letter.

Say something like:

Provide letter guidelines from the employer and gently inquire about an ETA if you get close to the deadline without receiving it.

Express Sincere Gratitude

Getting a letter takes time and effort on the writer’s part. Send a thank you card or small gift once they submit the letter to show your appreciation.

And let them know the outcome of your application so they see how their letter helped. Maintaining mutual gratitude cements relationships with references that can benefit your career down the line.

How to Politely Decline Writing a Letter You Don’t Feel Comfortable With

Maybe you’ve been asked to write a recommendation letter for an acquaintance or distant coworker. Or perhaps you worked with the candidate long ago and no longer feel able to endorse their abilities.

If you don’t believe you can write a persuasive, complimentary letter, it’s better to politely decline than write a lackluster one. Here’s how to graciously say no:

  • “I’m flattered you thought of me, but I don’t think I’m the best person to speak to your qualifications since we didn’t work together closely.”

  • “I appreciate you considering me as a reference, but I don’t feel I could provide a strong letter since our time working together was limited.”

  • “I wish you the best in your job search, but don’t think I could write a letter that fully does you justice for this role based on my experience working with you.”

  • “Given how long it’s been since we worked together, I don’t think I could provide up-to-date details about your skills and accomplishments. I suggest asking someone you’ve worked with more recently.”

Recommend they ask current supervisors or teammates who have directly overseen their recent work. Declining gracefully preserves goodwill while steering them towards better letter writers.

Key Takeaways

Securing strong reference letters is a key part of the application process. To get persuasive, compelling recommendations:

  • Ask early and provide letter writers with helpful informational materials
  • Give regular updates about your job search progress
  • Remind them about due dates in a polite, professional way
  • Show gratitude for their endorsement with thanks and updates about results
  • If you can’t write a solid letter for someone else, politely decline and recommend asking parties with more relevant experience

Following these dos and don’ts helps secure letters that make a convincing case and boost your chance of landing the job. So be mindful when requesting and crafting recommendation letters—a great one can be the deciding factor that wins you the position!

dos and donts writing reference letter

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WHAT JUDGES DO AND DON’T WANT TO SEE IN CHARACTER LETTERS

Who writes a reference letter?

The person who writes a reference letter is typically an employer, professor, supervisor or another individual who is familiar with the person the letter is being written for. A reference letter may also be referred to as a recommendation letter, letter of reference or letter of recommendation.

What if a professor declines to write a letter?

If one of your professors declines to write you a letter, don’t get upset. The professor is doing you a favour by declining to write a letter. You want to have strong letters of recommendation, and for whatever reason this professor doesn’t feel they can write you one. Now you have the chance to improve your application with a better reference.

What should you avoid when writing a reference letter?

Here are five practices to avoid when writing a reference letter: 1. Don’t forget to state your relationship with the candidate Your relationship with the candidate signifies your ability to witness their positive traits. It can make your recommendation more credible, especially if you and the reader may interact with the candidate in similar ways.

What should I do if someone asks for a reference letter?

Don’t recycle information for multiple letters If another student or colleague requests a reference letter, then start the writing process over. Make your recommendation central to the candidate that contacted you. Describing specific experiences with the candidate can make the letter appear more genuine.

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